Often when I meet new people, especially other parents the conversation goes a little something like this:
A Parent: How many Kids do you have?
A Parent: Boys / Girls? How old?
Me: 2 Girls, one is 10 the other is 19?
Now follows a moment of comprehension, they think, look at me, stutter a little bit and then usually follow up with something like:
A Parent: Wow you started young!
A Parent: You don't look that old!
Well they are correct on one fact, I am not "that" old (despite feeling it last week spending time with loads of younger parent bloggers)
I guess you can call us a modern family! Yes I do have two girls and yes there is a 9 year age gap between them, but I tell you what it certainly works! I see my sister and the hard work having 2 youngsters can be and think... perhaps our way was better!
When people have recovered from the shock, I often go on to tell them that I recommend the large age gap! It certainly helped when Katy was a baby, as Ashleigh wanted to be involved and help out! It certainly helped having an extra pair of hands available when Mel was not around or vice versa!
Now I have never discussed this on the blog before (I don't think), I have certainly never felt a need to but it will help explain the reason for the age gap! (not that it needs one) I am not Ashleigh's biological father.... but I am her Dad! Mel and I have been together since she was 4! Her biological father has never been in her life (his loss) and I am very lucky to have her in my life!
It was very rewarding seeing Ash grow up in those first 5 years Mel and I were together, she was (and still is) a great kid, never difficult when we first got together and was a very polite, friendly and loving kid, such a credit to Mel!
I have to admit when we found out Mel was pregnant I had a mild panic, yes I knew I could be a good parent but I had no bloody idea what to do with a baby! Give me a child from 4 years and up and I was there, I knew how to entertain them, what they liked etc but a baby... that was a whole new experience, one I must add that I loved and go to grips with very quickly!
But back to my original point, should it really be a shock that I have a 19 year old daughter, yes its not the norm but please don't open you mouth like a fly trap, after all things happen for a reason!
We live in a modern world, people and families change, I often wonder what people are thinking in that moment when they realise I am 35 and they do the math! Should I care? nope and to tell the truth I don't give a damn what other people think about it!
Now I know I previously did, I used to quickly add "well technically she is my step daughter" But I haven't done that for years, not least because there is no need to justify myself but mainly because I don't see Ashleigh as anything other than my daughter!
If you have an age gap between your kids have you experienced anything like this?